Yesterday, my client told me that his friend advised him to etc, etc in connection with his divorce.  With all due respect to his friend, the advice he gave him was horrible.  Why his friend, who is not an attorney, let alone a New Jersey divorce attorney, would give him any advice is beyond me.  What’s even worse is that my client was ready to follow that advice because his friend, who has gone through a divorce, seems like an expert.

I don’t care who the person is, if the person is not a divorce lawyer in the state in which you are getting divorced, the advice should be taken with all of the salt in the world.  In other words, do not rely upon it.  Instead, pick up the phone and call a good divorce lawyer and get advice from him or her.

This may sound crazy to some people, but I have had clients tell me that they are taking divorce from their soon to be ex-spouse.  Most of the time, this advice involves whether or not either of them should hire an attorney.  I sometimes feel like a broken record but I see too many people that went to court without a good divorce lawyer only to suffer the consequences for many years.  To save a few thousand dollars now, some will spend tens of thousands years later as a result of the mistakes that were made and/or to correct the mistakes that were made.

After you get divorced, you have to be your own person so I think you should start now.  If your spouse wants to go at it alone, let him or her but don’t follow that advice.  Why does your spouse really care about what you do with your money?  Chances are, your spouse may not want to take advantage of you by getting you to sign a settlement agreement that forces you to give up important rights and a lot of money.  I’ve seen it plenty of times.  Don’t make that mistake.

A new client that hired me this week told me  about his divorce which took years.  During the divorce, his wife filed domestic violence charges against him.  His divorce lawyer either did not have the experience to deal with the criminal charges or didn’t want to.  From what he told me, it seems like both.  This is a very common problem that I see all of the time.

Some lawyers are afraid to admit that they are over their head.  If I don’t know how to do something, I’d rather not not put my client at risk.  Instead, I will either work with another lawyer that has the experience with the law at issue or I will just refer that part of the case out for that lawyer to handle.  I also think some lawyers want to get every dollar that is coming out of the client’s pocket.  I don’t do that.

At my firm, we handle family law and criminal law and we handle both very well.  Domestic violence, in my opinion, is a combination of criminal law and family law and only a lawyer that is knowledgeable in both should handle these cases.  If you find yourself in a domestic violence situation on either side, don’t get caught with an attorney that can only handle half the case.  Otherwise, you may be regretting the consequences for years to come.